Do you, like me find times in your day where you know you DO NOT want to do X and yet you do it anyway?
Perhaps it is eating foods that you actually do not like or ‘should not’ eat.
Maybe you have found yourself procrastinating or sabotaging yourself as you pursue your daily tasks?
This can be a huge problem! Imagine if you do this day in day out – that means you are procrastinating and sabotaging the daily tasks or the daily goals AND ultimately your long-term goals and dreams.
Daily habits and behaviours lead to results or lack of results long-term.
Whatever your aims in life are – you want to know the real reason behind your behaviours and habits. This is called secondary gain.
Behind every action or inaction there is a reason or a need. Essentially WHY at a deep level we are doing or not doing something. It is not the surface level statement I have tended to say when faced with chocolate cravings ‘I just wanted some more chocolate’. WHY at a deep level is the actual reason – what do you really want? What do you really need?
By digging that little bit deeper to find the answers to some of these questions, people actually find the WHY. If they know the why then actually they can decide if the action or inaction they are about to do will actually meet that need. For instance, in the past I often felt tired after dinner. Something I think I needed was more energy. One method used to use was to eat chocolate deliver the energy I wanted. However, in reality this does not actually get what I want because I tend to want more and more because I still did not have sufficient energy. Other options I have actually had more success with include actually taking time out, relaxing and then heading to bed for a good sleep. Another option I have enjoyed is going for a little walk or stepping outside for some air. Sure, I still have chocolate and yet it is because I actually want a treat or enjoy the taste rather than simply to get me the energy I crave. Knowing the WHY helps deliver the outcome you want.
There are numerous ways to apply this in your life. Here are some tips:
Perhaps you can come up with more ideas and options? Please comment below to share the ideas!
I’ve noticed the people who use the WHY to help to streamline their actions tend to get the things they want. Perhaps you have noticed this too? Can you see yourself trying this at work? Why do I get to work late? At home? Why do I want someone to help with the dishes? And why do I then dismiss attempts for family members to help me with other household chores? Asking the deep level ‘WHY?’ question can assist you to get the WHAT you want because you know the REAL REASON you want this!
Other great resources and ideas from others in this field: